Do You Like Who You Are? Great Because You Are Really Cool.
If you are one of the many women who have figured out how to live their fortunate life, why do you like who you are? Because you have CHOSEN to like who you are. You can think ANY thought you prefer to think. So, you choose to like who you are. Congratulations, you have left the victim zone.
Why do you feel good about you? Again, because you can! Feeling good about yourself is FREE to do. Did you ever think of that? AND, you feel a happy feeling, too. FREE to feel happy? Yes you are!Why do you esteem yourself as equally priceless when you compare yourself to others? And the answer is…because you can! Hey, this is better than taking a pill! And, IT’S free! You’ve got one life to live. So, live it liking yourself.
Now here’s a secret I’m sharing just with you. I’m going to fill you in on this thing that happens, this natural thing that happens. You’ve got to work with it and soon you’ll routinely develop the secret to happy life.
First, just to let you know, I’ve been a brain dialog researcher since about 1990. So, I’m only telling you stuff I’ve learned and observed in clients. I mean I TEACH people this stuff and it really, really works.If you’re interested in more of this really good stuff, you can read some books about it.
First, if you’re a brain geek like me, you’ll love reading Ned Herrmann’s The Creative Brain. You will feel amazed to discover how your brain works.If you’re a lighter-geek woman who still loves to learn cool science stuff, I also recommend Dealing With People You Can’t Stand, Dealing With Relatives (…even if you can’t stand them), both by Dr. Rick Kirschner and Dr. Rick Brinkman. Finally, another book I recommend to my clients is Women Don’t Ask by Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever. These authors don’t actually come out and tell you BUT, these are BRAIN BOOKS.
So, here’s some really interesting stuff all about you and me.From birth, your brain contains the equivalent of 4 living computer software program application programs. I call them thoughtware programs because we activate/trigger the programs using thought. Depending upon the ideas we think, we either DO or DO not acceptably value ourselves. We think using instructions in those brain programs. Briefly, the following dialog examples demonstrate how we think using our 4 inborn programs. For the sake of clarification, let’s suppose you’re thinking about trying a new recipe for dinner. You could think these sample ideas using your 4 thoughtware programs described below. In this dialog you are talking to yourself through your decision process:
1-Using your lower left brain thoughtware program application program designed for us to control our ability to complete tasks… we can either inspire ourselves as we complete a task, or treat ourselves like an unreasonable dictator. The thought pattern dialog you might think as you decide whether or not to use this new recipe for dinner could sound like this:
Inspiration: “You can cook this new recipe. Do it because you simply choose to do it. First check and see if you have all the ingredients. If you do, just cook it!
“Unreasonable dictator: “You’re wasting time looking at this new recipe! Run to the fridge and see if you have the ingredients first. If you don’t, just make tuna salad. Hurry up. There’s more work to do before you go to bed. Get it done now!”Which dialog version would you prefer to hear to efficiently achieve your goal?
2-Using your lower right brain thoughtware program application program designed for us to develop and maintain meaningful relationships and feel feelings… we can either tell ourselves the truth about mentally healthy relationships or treat ourselves inconsiderately and maintain unhealthy relationships. According to the feelings we feel, within ourselves we will act considerate or inconsiderate. When we interact with others, we can experience considerate or inconsiderate behavior. The key is acknowledging that we all have basic rights that must be respected. The thought pattern dialog you might think as you decide whether or not to use this new recipe for dinner could sound like this:
Considerate: “Okay, I know I would like to taste this new recipe, but would my family like it? Oh, what the heck. I’ll cook it. If he dislikes it, they can eat tuna. You only live once!”
Inconsiderate: “I have to think of my husband and my kids. They don’t really like change. But I would like to taste something different. I’m feeling tired of my usual cooking. But, what if they fuss? Oh, I’ll just make the usual. The stress is just too much for me to face hearing their objections.”Which dialog version feels good for you?
3-Using your upper right brain thoughtware program application program designed for us to act significant, creative and entertaining… we think up new ideas, need to feel appreciated and significant, can feel insecure, can act outgoing and entertaining. According to the way we see things, we can think and act like we feel significant or insignificant creative geniuses. The thought pattern dialog you might think as you decide whether or not to use this new recipe for dinner could sound like this:
Significant: “How about if I make this exotic new dish? New stuff will tantalize my taste buds. I‘m up for a little exotic cooking. I’ll make enough for the neighbors. Hey, we could have a party. That sounds GREAT! I’m sure my family will LOVE this stuff!”
Insignificant: “Nobody appreciates me and all the cooking I do. Hey, maybe cooking this new recipe will impress everyone! And, I’ll wear my new dress. I hope that will get my family to notice me.”Which amazing dialog version makes YOU feel appreciated and significant as you hear it?
4-Using your upper left brain thoughtware program application program designed for us to critically analyze… we can theorize or criticize. Theorizing, we think in terms of possibilities. Criticizing, we point out perceived flaws but offer no solutions to improve a situation. The thought pattern dialog you might think as you decide whether or not to use this new recipe for dinner could sound like this:
Theoretical: “Rats! I’m out of milk for this new recipe. But, what could I use as an acceptable milk substitute? If I do cook this new recipe, I wonder if I could simply use water? Hmmm. I’ll give it a whirl and see what happens.”
Critical: “What’s wrong with me anyway? I can’t substitute water for milk in this recipe. That won’t work. OH, I just give up!”Which dialog version seems exactly the perfect way for YOU to think?Okay, so that’s all for this post. I’ll be back later. If you burn the dinner in the meantime, remember you are fabulous. Burning dinner is just ONE thing you did today. Remember to think about all the other GREAT stuff you did that turned out according to your preferences! See, I told you were cool.
Drop me a note, at firstname.lastname@example.org or visit my other blog at www.hypnoticbraintalk.blogspot.com. Or, if you’re getting married and looking for ideas on reducing your wedding day stress, check out a podcast on www.clickcaster.com/hypnoticbraintalk. See ya later. Susan